Snow Day

Here is my picture story:

I woke-up to my Women and Law teacher, Maggie, calling me to cancel class. I was so exstatic I went outside to revel in the snow! Oh snow...I love you!



Then Asher got upset that I was having all the fun so I let him out. And he got to see his first snow.

He did't know what it was and he started acting like a crazy cat...well, he is a crazy cat.

He decided to dig it all up and eat it!

And then he realized there were still birds around. But it was too cold so we went back inside.

Where he destroyed an imaginary pink bird.

And took a nap.

Before round two.

So Real

Here I am, looking out the window, watching the rain fall and seeing the people moving through it. The rhytmic taps on the ground, the surrounding chatter, the casual music; it's all surreal.
Surreal... do you think that means "so real"? Like suddenly it hits you how real everything is. Because earlier we were moving through the rain, ignoring it and doing our business; not really paying attention.





And then you watch other people move through it, going on with their business. And you realize how involved in your business you are. You remember the many things that you ignore, that you forget. You remember how small you are in this world; you remember how special you and each person are; you remember that everyone plays a part in this world, somehow, and you are another unique part of it.

It's ironic. A surreal experience doesn't feel real at all, but at a closer look, it reminds you of what is real.

Women and Law

So I had my first ASAP class last night, 6pm-9:38pm. And utterly loved it. Very small class and we discussed the material and women's liberation, feminism, and media and our culture. We watched Killing Us Softly 3. It was great. I've always been aware of how advertising sends us little big messages. But this video really showed me some I never thought of, but I could totally see it. There were some women in the class who honestly had no clue where the video was coming from. Very interesting....media brainwashing actually works....very scary!

Anyway, today is day two and I am pumped. I'm also going to be praying we get out early so that I can practice and still make it to the symphony tonight. 10:30am-6pm. Ouch!

Trial, Truth, and Error.

It's funny what you can try to convince yourself after something has happened. "I knew this was coming." "I didn't really like him that much in the first place." "There are other people that I think work better for me." The truth is, if all of those things were true, then I would have listened to them in the first place. I act on the feelings that feel most right (and sometimes that is simply what I want the most at the time). But If something truly did not feel right, I would listen to that feeling, because it is the strongest. I can't ignore it.

In the end, When you listen to those feelings, when you seek what is right, then everything works out the way it is supposed to. I might not understand why somethings happen, why somethings work certain ways, but I can cope with that. I am seeking what is best, even if I have to endure trial after trial to finally learn how to get there, and I still believe that everything works out the way that it is supposed to.

Not a fan of Global Warming, huh?

A global switch to efficient lighting systems would trim the world's electricity bill by nearly one-tenth. The carbon dioxide emissions saved by such a switch would, it concludes, dwarf cuts so far achieved by adopting wind and solar power. Wow. According to Paul Waide, a senior policy analyst with the IEA and one of the report's authors, "19% of global electricity generation is taken for lighting -- that's more than is produced by hydro or nuclear stations, and about the same that's produced from natural gas." For the individual TreeHugger, the report concludes that the easiest, most obvious switch to make is from incandescent bulbs to compact fluorescent systems, and to watch out for the LED revolution, just around the lighting corner.

Info available @ http://www.treehugger.com/files/2006/06/change_a_light.php

At the rate that we are going with over 150 new coal plants in the U.S. they (Energy Information Administration) say that by 2030 CO2 emissions will be up by 43%. Everybody agrees that the weather is getting crazy. And while some people appreciate the warm weather in Cincinnati in other parts of the world it means disaster and possibly death. In Oklahoma, it isn't snowing. It's solid ice 4 inches thick. In some areas school has been canceled for over a week. Oklahoma hasn't seen this sort of weather since the ice age. An area that is seriously unprepared for this sort of weather. Salt? No. They don't do that. They do tornados. Blizzards? Not till recently. National Geographic talks about the polar ice caps melting and 4-5 hurricanes happening in odd spots all in one year. New Orleans wasn't prepared for Katrina. But in the future, even with super levies can it survive ? Who really knows? All of this is completely unpredictable. But one thing you can count on is that it isn't going to stop. It will in all likelihood get severly worse.

All the technology we have and yet not millions, but literally many billions of people live in poverty? While they starve we are to contine to emit millions of tons of CO2 and who knows whatelse in to the air, poluting the world they live in. And if you use a damn lightbulb that uses less energy you save yourself a measily $8 and you emit less carbon into the air and what of it? That's great. So you fixed one problem, but oh yea. You don't recycle. And billions of people are starving. And can you believe that George's dad died on Grey's last night?

So it's always something. And you can't fix everything. But maybe the next time you are out shopping and you need to replace your incandescent light bulbs you can at least think about the flourescent ones that save you money...and maybe...buy them...and if you do then you are making a big change. One person. If you bought one flourescent light bulb it woud last you possibly years and every time you turn it on you will know that you are not emitting tons CO2 in the air, potentially making the world an even more horrible place to live in for the billions of people who are living below the poverty line all of the globe. Even if you aren't thinking about it, one action sets off a chain reaction.

P.S. Estimated potential $90 savings a year http://www.realsimple.com/realsimple/content/0,21770,1206333,00.html

At Least It's Clearer

The haze may lift, but that does not mean that it reveals an untangled mess. Thereis still a lot to work through, but at least it's clearer now. Maybe it can actually get somewhere.

oh so sleepy

i am pooped.

in the past 48 hours i have subsisted on 3 hours of sleep

Things Are Looking Up!

Or they will!

If you can't state the problem, then you can't find a solution for it.

Different issues have risen for me, and I couldn't understand where they were coming from. It turns out that they were spawning all from one issue. So now that I know what the problem is, I can finally do something about it.

And this week will soon be over for you Miss Les. Soon Soon Soon!

Oh Hell!

I have so much work to do I don't know when I'll get a chance to sleep. And thanks to Red Bull it might never happen.


Red Bull, I hate you.

Where's the problem?

My circumstances are incredible. Written on paper, I couldn't ask for more. They are ideal. So what's missing?

At some point I have to realize what's me and what's real. Aren't I real, though? So if something doesn't feel right, then something isn't right. But I might have to look elsewhere to find where the problem really is...

Until You

Everything was going well, and smoothely, like pieces of a puzzle, until you started feeling crazy and out of sorts; Now I'm crazy and out of sorts! Or did I start it?

Who's pointing fingers anyway!

Things are better... because I realize he doesn't mean to do anything; it's not a Guy-thing, it's a Gwenn-thing. More or less. So now that I know that it's something I have to do... I don't know what to do. Talk, learn to deal, make something happen...

Get your events settled down Miss Les so that mine will too! Please!

=)

chaos= my life

The next two days are going to be busy as hell. Rehearsals, lesson, reed class, and ASAP course for the weekend: two essays, read about 20 articles, journal, and a project...oh yea, and I have to compose a percussion piece. Oh Crap!!!

.*<><>**.....

Oh poop.

Sometimes I get ticked off. Anyway, after a little sleep at least thats gone.

Orion

David and I went to the Cincinnati Observatory last night to attend a class on the constellation Orion. It was a great class. I learned so much. And I think it was valuable because alot of the information I could have gotten off the internet, but what I learned from the class was how to use the information when you are actually staring at the night sky and trying to find the constellations. It also helped me visualize the depictions of the constellations better so that when I look at the sky I can see the stories. It was a great class. The only bad thing was that it was raining so we couldn't use the amazing telescopes they have there. But I totally intend on going back. If you have $5 in quarters laying around I highly recommend taking them to the Observatory, and they don't even mind! Actually...I didn'y even have quarters. I used nickels and dimes, and I even put in a shekel cause I ran out of quarters...oops...

I think....

it is time to practice my butt off!

Sour Cream Apple Pie

Rachel and I decided to bake a pie and watch season three of Northern Exposure.


























And it looked delicious. And I can promise you it was, is, and always will be.



RECIPE @ http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/recipe_views/views/13330

(Only I use 1 1/4 cups of suger for the filling...)

Oh Bloggers

So today I got all mixed up with the world of blogs and I was truly surprised at what I found.

Vibrant colors, tons of hot links, and just plain amazing blogs. People using amazing templates and getting rave reactions. Made me rethink how awesome this blog really is. It is awesome....to Gwenn and me that is.

But here are some blogs I just couldn't shake:

http://lenacorwin.blogspot.com/ http://rootmag.typepad.com/

http://flygirls.typepad.com/ http://featured.typepad.com/

http://lulublookerprize.typepad.com/

http://ohjoy.blogs.com/

and of course there are way too many more.....

An Artistic Mystery

This was my final project in my first studio. There was a lot about that year that was just a disappointment. But when you can see how beautiful those disappointments can be, it becomes simply precious.

How does this Hamas video make you feel?

So they don't plan to resolve issues diplomatically or through any sort of negotiation or reasonable pathways. They just plan to kill Israelis and their supporters. That sounds intelligent and reasonable to me. What about you?

Small print: I'm being sarcastic.

Ali G Show

New Developments in Darfur

Dear Reader,

I want to share some important news from Khartoum. New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson just released a joint statement with Sudanese President Omar Al-Bashir that, if implemented, would bring some immediate security and relief to the people of Darfur as well as provide a clear path forward to long-term peace in the region.


We asked Governor Richardson (pictured above) to travel to Sudan to discuss ways to secure peace in Darfur and to end the genocide. The Governor was accompanied by Save Darfur Senior International Coordinator Ambassador (ret.) Lawrence Rossin, Refugees International Executive Director Kenneth Bacon, and Public and International Law and Policy Group senior attorney Amjad Atallah. Since Sunday, when they arrived in Khartoum, Governor Richardson and the delegation have visited Darfur and participated in a variety of meetings with government officials, rebel leaders, humanitarian officials, AU commanders and UN officials.

The promises from President Bashir in this agreement are encouraging. They include commitments to:

A 60-day ceasefire with an international peace summit to be held before March 15, 2007.
Sudan's cooperation to work with the African Union and United Nations on the deployment of a hybrid peacekeeping force in Darfur.
Ensuring "zero tolerance" policies for gender-based violence in Darfur.
Free access for humanitarian aid workers and journalists.

Click here to read the full joint statement and the press release.
http://www.savedarfur.org/newsroom/releases/cease_fire_agreement_
offers_a_moment_of_opportunity_for_political_settlemen/

Your concerns for the people of Darfur were voiced directly to President Bashir by Governor Richardson and Ambassador Rossin. We believe that today's agreement offers a promising step forward to end this four-year nightmare for the people of Darfur. By no means, however, has the genocide ended.

We call urgently upon Sudan, the United Nations, the African Union, and the Bush Administration to make these promises become a reality for the long-suffering people of Darfur.

We must demand that the international community take advantage of this dramatic progress. Your help in this effort will be vital in the months ahead.

Thank you for your contribution to these new developments.

Best regards,

David Rubenstein
Save Darfur Coalition

Also see: http://www.governor.state.nm.us/press.php?id=338

Alicia de Larrocha

Jascha Heifetz

Sabine Meyer

Emma Johnson

Sharon Kam (m'Yisrael)

Bass Clarinet = Deep Sax

DARFUR. is happening right NOW.

More Websites about Genocide in Darfur:

http://www.ushmm.org/conscience/alert/darfur/steidle/?gclid=CNfUmY3w1IkCFQVYSAodxBqG2g

http://www.genocideintervention.net/index.php

http://www.darfurscores.org/

http://www.standnow.org/

http://hrw.org/reports/2004/sudan0504/

http://www.darfurisdying.com/

http://www.crisisgroup.org/home/index.cfm?id=3060&l=1#C2

http://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/news/sudan.cfm

There are so many sites dedicated to Darfur. Why is it important to check out these sites? Because you can't keep ignoring it. That's what we do. We see these things on TV but then we keep eating dinner with our families and talking about our days. But just across the ocean there are people who can't eat dinner with their families. And if they did, can you imagine what they would say about their days? Genocide happening for not the first time in the last hundred years. And what is so much worse than the slaying of a people is the world's indifference to it. It's not to say that people don't care. Look at all the websites, and I didn't even post half of the ones I found. Not to mention articles about Darfur. But nothing is happening. For example, if in one month alone only 10 people at every liberal arts university became interested and started to send letters to state representatives, to congressmen, to our UN representatives that would be a total of 460 people a month just with Ohio's liberal arts colleges. Think about how much of a difference your voice really can make.

There is an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond about voting. Debra runs for a position in the PTA. Raymond ofcourse, selfishly tries to foil her plot to win by voting for the guy who brought buffalo wings. Debra lost by one or two votes. Ofcourse, Raymond has a big fat mouth and gives himself away. Debra gets pissed and it's a night in the doghouse for Raymond. There are consequences for voting and not voting. Your voice makes a difference. Use it. Use it right. A choir isn't made up of one person. It's made up of a group of one persons. You are the one person that may be the tipping point in convincing someone in our government to actually make a difference.

DANIEL.......

Is Almost Here!!!!!!!!!

We make Each other.

When you're happy, I'm happy.

When you have a bad day, I have a bad day.

When you find romance, I find romance.

When your romance turns into a douche bag, my romance flourishes into the love of my life.

Okay, my romance douche bags too...

(which is a really bad expression, come to think of it.)

All in all, my love, we're connected, something similar to sisters, I'd imagine. We make each other feel what either feels.

And I love it.

And I'm so happy you're happy!!!

Gwenn

It makes me happy when you are happy.

Gioachino Rossini (1792-1868)

What we already knew about Rossini:

He was born into an Italian music family (father was a horn player and mother was a singer) in the late 18th century. Right away little Rossini was thrown into the world of music. He learned harpsichord and couterpoint among many other things. At a very young age, Rossini went off to the Conservatory of Bologna. Early on, at least by the age of 18, Rossini began writing operas and they were well-liked. Tancerdi, written in 1813, was a huge hit. The opera is pretty much about forbidden love. At the end of a war between families, the father of one family offers the hand of his daughter to the other family but unbeknownst to either family she is secret engaged to Tancerdi, some soldier. And ofcourse, chaos insues and people die. The daughter is put in prison because she's a bad girl and Tancredi rushes off to a battle and is slain. And the daughter is married off to the other family. (Copy of the score http://www.dlib.indiana.edu/variations/scores/bhr1017/index.html) After Tancredi, Rossini continued to work and was hired as a musical director for two different theaters in Italy. He was paid well and in addition to his duties as director he was also required to produce at least one opera per year. His next huge success was in 1816, when Rossini completed the opera buffa The Barber of Seville. Opera buffa made it's way into opera permanently and in the ensuing years Rossini continued in his success and composed twenty more operas, concluding with William Tell. Ofcourse, Rossini composed in plenty of other genres other than opera such as sacred and chamber music, vocal music, cantatas and instrumental music.

What you didn't know:

At the age of 6 he played triangle in his daddy's band.
His daddy was a rebel and was sent to jail for welcoming Napolean when he invaded Italy back along time ago.
Was nicknamed "Monsier Crescendo" and "The Little German"
Could have retired when he was 32 years old. I think he kept composing till the end though...
He was quite a handful as a child.

Interesting links:
http://www.rossinioperafestival.it/
http://www.conservatoriorossini.it/default0.aspx
http://www.allposters.com/-st/Gioachino-Rossini-Posters_c1598_s53269_.htm

Karl Leister (video)

Mr. Karl Leister plays the last movement of C.M. Weber clarinetquintet with members of BPO (1990) Berliner Philarmonie.

Info on KL:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Leister
http://www.arborweb.com/reviews/0503.karlleister-review.html
http://www.ruf.rice.edu/~musi/calendar/karl_leister.html
http://www.niu.edu/PubAffairs/RELEASES/2005/feb/clarinet.shtml

I'll send my SOS to the world

MAKE SOME NOISE!

http://action.savedarfur.org/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=5175

http://www.savedarfur.org/section/take_action

And if you're going to make some noise you might as well make a BIG RACKET!

Tzipur

Sunny day, sweeping the clouds away...

Actually it's cloudy outside. But it's Dear Sunday and while all the birds have abandoned their nests and flown off to little caves I have the entire world to myself. The entire empty world is all mine. Once a week I can traverse this hectic place without confusion or chaos. I can be almost completely isolated from the other birds chirping incessantly. I can go any which way I choose...and the day is peaceful...at the start.

Collide

The dawn is breaking.

A light shining through.

You're barely waking,

and I'm tangled up in you.

Yeah.

But I'm open, you're closed.

Where I follow, you'll go.

I worry I won't see your face

light up again.

Even the best fall down sometime.

Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.

Out of the doubt that fills my mind

I somehow find you and I collide.

I'm quiet, you know.

You make a first impression.

I found I'm scared to know

I'm always on your mind.

Even the best fall down sometime.

Even the stars refuse to shine.

Out of the back you fall in time,

You somehow find you and I collide.

Don't stop here.

I lost my place.

I'm close behind.

Even the best fall down sometime.
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.

Out of the doubt that fills your mind,

you finally find you and I collide.

Finally find...

you and I

collide.

-Howie Day

December's Rose

There sits an elderly couple behind me at this coffee shop. She reads him pieces from the newspaper that sparks her interest, and he asks her for words that stump him on his crossword puzzle. While sipping coffee, they simply share a part of their lives and interests together. Each other's company have been their world for however long... Their trials, their lessons, their lives have been each other's for however long. And to see them still sharing, still content, is as touching as a rose in December.

The Long..

Things happen. Your will is to accept them, to make the most of them, to learn from them, and to cherish them. But sometimes that is not enough. Sometimes you know it isn't through. You know something was missing, is missing... And sometimes you cannot do anything but wait. And long for it to unravel.

Tzion

Last night, even though I wasn't in Israel physically in my heart I passed through Zion Gate and prayed at the Kotel.













Walking through is so hectic and so exciting. Cars drive through, scraping against the walls of the gate as people scatter through. Lines of taxis impatiently waiting outside, and on Yom Shishi (yom katzar!) it's even more insane than you could ever imagine.




But once you step through security and you are upon the Kotel it takes your breath away and immediately you are flooded with a deep feeling of spirituality. For me, I was in awe and I couldn't wait to pray at the foot of the wall. You start far away and slowly inch your way up. Eventually you look up to get your barings and you can't believe how close you are to the wall. There are two black doves that always nestle in on of the huge crevices in the wall. There's barely enough room for them to fit. It seems like they are always there, maybe just to hear the prayers. Who knows.

And once you are right at the wall, you can see all the prayers that hold it up. And if you are me, you can't wait to kiss it with your lips. I miss the Kotel HaMaariv. I miss Yerushalaim.

Good news!!!!!!! I think I'm going back spring break in March to help restore areas devastated by ketusha rockets fired by hizbollah.

Drowning

Sometimes I feel so out of place or weird. And I also feel misunderstood. But after being at Mt. Hertzl and Yad Vashem it makes me feel so selfish and silly to complain at all. But the honest truth is that when it hurts it hurts.

I wish I wasn't me sometimes. But at the same time I like who I am. I just really hate my flaws. Some things I just can't help. Other people CAN help being mean or being assholes. Even with all my flaws I'm not mean and I don't take advantage of anyone's disadvantages. I always try to stick up for the low man on the totem pole. I try to be understanding. I try my hardest not to gossip, it's ugly and hurtful. I'm certainly not an asshole. And I am always trying to improve myself. I may have a lot of flaws. I may be quite the space cadet, but I honstly try my hardest not to space out. I just can't help it, but trust me, I try very hard to be here on earth and not out there in my thoughts. I know that I get crazy ideas in my head and get overly excited about things. But I'd rather be over enthusiastic about anything in life rather than dull and satisfied and unexcited about life at all. Sometimes I get shy or I have a hard time coming out of my shell. Sometimes I don't feel like saying anything. Or I don't know what to say. And I know some people, like you, Gwenn, think that "my version" isn't real and just in my head. And that's fine. But I disagree strongly. And it makes me feel bad that you feel that way. Because I always try to tell the truth and to imply that I don't really hurts. And you may have worded things differently, but all the same you said it. And I do not agree with you. And you don't have to agree with me. That's fine.

Right now I could really hate who I am, what with all the flaws I have, but why? I am hardworking, sweet, incredibly flawed, but always looking for friendship and understanding. I am totally a good friend. Always willing to help. And almost always willing to take advice and listen to what other people have to say. I try so hard to do the right things. Maybe I try too hard. Sometimes I even feel like the people who should be my friends are walking all over me cause maybe I'm too nice. There's not a whole lot wrong with me that I don't already acknowledge and try to fix and all the people who exploite my flaws, make caddy comments, try to hurt me, or constantly make me feel bad about myself can just shove it. So I have flaws! Ya know what, you do too. Not that the "you"s out there are ever gonna read this. C'est la vie...

It still felt good to rant.

School

It's a drag....

Actually it's not. I'm really looking forward to everything I'm going to learn. It's exciting. And I'm really excited about all my new friends. Hurray for that!

Gotta get moving!

I need to get into motion.I'm not sure how to kick it off though. I could be very meticulous and really plan it out or I could be spontanious and just dive in. Or I can slowly let unravel until its suddenly tomorrow. Or I could do nothing and just think about it.

I always either let it slowly unravel or dive in. I think it's about time I sat down. Evaluated things. Studied my life and the coming three months. And make some decisions. And get something done. I think it's about time. Time. time...time......time.....